Sakshi [for DesiPundit]
When Patrix asked me to do a post on Feminism for DesiPundit’s anniversary celebration, I took up the offer without even giving it a second thought. Obviously I had my reasons behind this impulse decision; firstly this write-up was for one of the most popular desi-blogs (I would be an idiot, to let this opportunity slip by) secondly, the folks at DesiPundit were the first to support /encourage my writings and lastly, the topic was Feminism (Come on! I am nicknamed ‘Feminist’, so I can write on it even when I am snoring).
But when the time arrived for me to start working on this write-up, my mind completely froze. Mind you! The confusion wasn’t because I didn’t have stuff to write, the problem was that I had way too much cooking up in my head. As they say, ‘too many cooks spoil the broth’, here I was worried that too much information would spoil the entire purpose of this post. So in need of some light, I asked a couple of bloggers (good friends) on how I should approach this topic and they both by some freakish miracle of nature, advised the same thing.
So taking up their advice, I would like to use this opportunity to once and for all clear my stance on ‘Feminist’ and the reasons why I chose to be one.
Frankly speaking before blogging, I barely ever used the word, ‘Feminism’. One can say that I had a very narrow-viewpoint; for me Feminism consisted of only those women who practically wore it on their sleeves. You know the ones who were out there fighting for women rights and equality. Never bothered or cared to look deep into it because I never felt the need for it.
But things started to shape and mean differently, once I started blogging and even more when I started taking blogging seriously. Starting from causal posts and then moving on to topics of grave importance came gradually. Reading blogs of other women bloggers inspired me to research and write on social stigmas such as, child marriages, domestic violence, live-in relationships, plight of Afghani women, Homosexuality in India, etc.
Blogging compelled me to think about issues/incidents that never had an effect on my personal life, per say but meant a great deal to my country and its people. Being a women, writing and discussing the status of women in Indian society – came naturally. And some-where along the journey, I was tagged as a Feminist writer of the desi-blogosphere.
The best thing about the Indian Blogosphere is that it has place for everyone; the good, the bad and the ugly and they all have a purpose to serve. The good posts inspire and make you re-think your views/thoughts, bad posts make you want to rip-them apart and the ugly ones are there to remind you that stupid people do exist.
In my blogging experience, I have come across all the three. But thanks to my feminist label, I get wee-bit more reaction from the later two. For example, it’s not a hidden fact that I am one of the favorite targets of the ‘Saving Indian Family’ brigade, in other words ‘I am the (so-called) victim’s victim’. Agree I have never given them reason to shower their positive emotions on me, but neither have I gone out of my way to force my opinion on them. Many of my non-women centric posts have been subjected to their circus act. The ironic bit about the whole relationship here is that these are the very people, who praised and supported my views when I wrote a post on (some) women taking unfair advantage of the Alimony system in India.
Just as all five fingers are not the same; the interpretation of feminism differs from women to women, society to society and country to country. In my opinion, Feminism is something very personal to any and every woman, some are comfortable in expressing it, whereas some happy with just containing it within themselves. It is all about making the best possible use of the rights and choices available. It is about striving to achieve the impossible; it’s about using resources to create some breathable space in our society. And it’s everything to do with freedom.
I am also not the sort to accept everything that is thrown at me in the name of Feminism. I am aware of incidents/facts of women and (name-sake) women support groups, who exploit the rights and benefits given to them by the society & government and go about preaching anti-men sentiments. But one needs to understand that these women in no-way represent feminism or feminist values and they more aptly fall under the category of ‘sexist’. It is simply the case of separating the bad apples from the good ones.
Blogging not only enhanced and nurtured my views on Feminism but it also made me use these very views in a constructive form and put them in action. For example, creating awareness of the workers plight in India through my post on Akbarally’s Workers Dispute. Now just incase if the same post was written by a male blogger then he would have been called an activist, but here I am identified as a Feminist. Doesn’t this fall on the lines of double standards adopted by certain members of our freethinking society?
Feminists come in all different shapes, colors and sizes and genders! I know men who support and fight for women’s causes. To me they are feminists also. Feminism for me boils down to just two basic necessities; be a good human being and the right to use my freedom as and when I choose. A good humanist is also a good feminist. The two terms can be interchangeable to a great degree.
And therefore I can proudly claim that I am a Feminist.
I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We’ve been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can’t live that way
I am unwritten, can’t read my mind, I’m undefined
I’m just beginning, the pen’s in my hand, ending unplanned [Source]
Comments
22 comments. Leave your comment »
temporal
Jul 6th, 2006 at 9:24 am | #
Saks:
nice to see this here:)
there are a myriad of definitions of feminism in recent times from betty friedan to gloria steinham, to simone de beauvoir to sontag to………you get the picture so why add mine on?
yes, indeed
all agree in various degrees to ‘redress past injustices’ and to provide a more level playing field for the future…i believe injustices in their purest form are non-discriminatory
the perpetrator may be an unjust person, organisation, state or even society at large – but the victim is not necessarily a woman…the victim could be of any gender
hence in the fight against injustice we are all together—so why not apply a bigger collective label – why splinter the bigger cause?
Suyog
Jul 6th, 2006 at 12:41 pm | #
Being feminist is fine I think, but being obsessive about being a feminist is umm… funny. The more I read your stuff, the more I feel you are moving towards the latter. Please, stay with the former
Nikita
Jul 6th, 2006 at 12:48 pm | #
Hello to everyone who reads this comment!
Feminism! I must say what a topic! It’s one of those conversations that will no doubt cause some sparks between men and women, and between the female circles!! Oh yes amongst women too! I have had such conversations with many of my girlfriends, where all of us had different ideas about feminisms. Some of my friends had very extreme ideologies about feminisms, the burn the bra attitude. Some were quite quiet with their views, and were happy with the current perceptions of women in society. However, I and few of my friends had different opinions on the matter, which is very much reflected in this post. Now all the male counterparts who read this comment will automatically think that of course I am going to agree to everything in the blog post because I a female. Frankly, this is not true. The reason why I relate to this blog article is because for once I am reading an article that is not left or right wing on the subject of feminism. Instead it just simply puts a clear perspective on matters and re-educates people on the true definition of feminism. I completely oppose extreme feminists. Purely because these days I find such people get so wound up don’t actually think about anything, start playing dirty tricks like all politicians and forget the real cause for their fight that is equality. Instead sexists give a bad name to feminists. Sexists are those who are constantly trying to prove that women are better than men. I don’t believe in the fact that females should all be left wing about the matter. The author is right in calling such people sexist and not feminists. Feminism is all about respecting every one for who they are. Be it men, children, women, animals, homosexuals, bisexuals, whatever. By respecting other beings, you should give them their freedom to express themselves in the way they want to. I have nothing against men. I respect them for what they are. But, I do insist that men and women must be treated equally as we all live together side by side. The only main difference I see in the two genders is our anatomy- it’s only physical. However, our minds are made by the very same components, structured in the same manner; we are able to think of thoughts and process them in the same way, so why cannot we behave as equals?? If men can be top hair stylists, or chefs then why a woman can’t be given the chance to become the top business woman?? So I end my rather long comment by saying, we are the people in the 21st century, gone are the cavemen days, so lets coexists peacefully together! There is no superior gender. The world is everyone’s oyster so we all, men and woman, should be given the freedom to whatever the hell they want to do!!! By giving women the same amount of freedom, no harm is going be done, we will be creating a whole new better world
Nikita
Jul 6th, 2006 at 12:57 pm | #
i disagree with suyog. I don’t think sakshi is moving towards the latter. She is well and truly being in the former i.e. a real feminist. If you have read the article carefully she not once bad mouth anyone of another race, gender?? Nope!! She is merely just highlighting all the issues to do with feminism, in her own words – separating the bad and the good apples. I don’t think she is being obsessive. I think again, you need to define what obsessive feminism is. Merely by just talking about the issues and declaring yourself feminism isn’t being obsessed by it. That obsessive is what i have mentioned in my previous comment as being sexist! And yes those people are funny. Don’t think sakshi is giving that message : D
Apoplexy
Jul 6th, 2006 at 4:05 pm | #
That was funny! really! Keep blogging.Way to go.More funny posts like this.
Sakshi
Jul 6th, 2006 at 8:46 pm | #
Temp – Excatly my point. Being a feminist doesnot mean to be concerned about betterment of the female gender alone but of the society as a whole. Don’t understand why (some) people perceive it in such a bad light??
Suyog – Not that really care but would be great if you could explain how am I moving to the latter bit.
If you think making most of my freedom, education, etc is obbession – then I am surely guilty.
Apoplexy – Wish I could understand humour…just the way you do. Wait! On second thoughts….I think I am better off. Keep Blooging.
Nikita –
Thanks re.
Suyog
Jul 6th, 2006 at 9:18 pm | #
@Sakshi: You asked for it
. I genuinely like reading a lot of what you have to say, but of late I think u are obsessed with dragging SIF in every post of yours in one way or another. For example, even here on desipundit, you made it a point to take remarks at them, when you could have done without it. Instead of highlighting them, how about telling us about people who loved your posts and what they had to say about your views? Or how about something where your views gave hope to women to stand up? Or joy to women that someone speaks for them without inhibition? Instead, you went your familiar route again. Everyone, and including you know that you are way way above ‘em 
Secondly, Almost everyone who’s heard of you knows you are a feminist, and a good one at that, and you need not emphasize it again and again like u do here. Thats the reason I feel that you are being obsessed about your feminist stance.
Please, take this as a objective feedback, and not as flame war. I like hearing what you have to say, and hope you take it in the right spirit too.
Cheers pal,
Suyog
Sakshi
Jul 6th, 2006 at 9:29 pm | #
Suyog – Hmmmm…I think yu got me a bit wrong here. If you look thru my any women-centric posts, never do I mention the word ‘SIF’. If you have read my posts especially the ones on Desicritics, you would have noticed how they rant all over anything written by me. First I use to react now I just ignore.
The reason why I mentioned them here is because it’s not only ME but any and anyone (men & women) who writes on women-related issues is attacked by them. Then how could I leave them out !!!
If I write about the ones who *love* me then I would be blamed for bragging….hahahahaha. Then again you have done it for me here na.
Anyways, thanks for your feedback and don’t worry I won’t rant on your blog for this.
Pratyush
Jul 6th, 2006 at 10:31 pm | #
A good humanist is also a good feminist. The two terms can be interchangeable to a great degree.
That for me is the key. Championing cuases for equal opportunities is some thing which every one should strive to achieve in out society.
Suyog, I don’t think talking about an experience (SIF) while recounting on feminism is obsession. It was natural progression. Also, the explaining on feminism was a bit necessary as she was writing on feminism.
If you are asked to write on topic x, you are most likely to define it as well. She took the line of her personal experience and growth on the feminism stance rather than the female plight in India which for me was perfectly fine.
Just what I feel.
sudha
Jul 6th, 2006 at 10:41 pm | #
For the reason that I am not sure if I want to drag her into this redundant discussion, I am going to just quote Cadence here and not link her. This is just another interesting perspective on the term “feminist” and does not necessarily apply directly to the views held/shared by the entities above.
The semantics of a word are determined by its usage.Regardless if a dictionary or encyclopaedia defines feminism as the “belief in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes� (American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language qtd. at http://www.dictionary.com), popular use interprets feminism as a radical movement, full of militant extremists.
Some self-defined feminists choose to struggle against this popular definition, in a quest to open the eyes and ears of society to the important work of the women’s movements.
Feminism has ballooned to include experiences of discrimination in regards to race, ethnicity, age, class, sexuality, and ability and fueled the debate regarding the social construction of both gender and sex. Feminism is too narrow a term to encompass all these issues. The word “feminist� limits the scope of one’s concern to issues specific only to women’s oppression.
There is a danger in “ism’s�. Identifying with an “ism� or as an “ist� can prevent an individual from pursuing their own thoughts and drawing their own conclusions and plans for action. When a group reputation develops, members of the group are automatically accorded this reputation and are no longer assessed as individuals. In the case of feminism, this leads back to the problem of language and stereotypes. It is very difficult for some people to accept that not all feminists are alike, like Anderson herself realizes (32). Identifying as an “ist� also creates in-group and out-group status. No longer is individual behaviour assessed, instead the question is asked whether an individul is “one of us or one of them?� When this happens the focus is no longer on issues of oppression and dominance but on belonging and rank.
People are holistic individuals with identities composed of multiplicitous determinants like age, class, sexuality, race, ethnicity, religion, ability, etc. When feminism is defined in terms of women’s oppression, it is difficult to include all these other factors, which affect an individual. It is impossible and unproductive to rank oppression and this is what the concept of feminism does.
Because there are many issues that women continue to face, like childcare, the glass ceiling, the pink collar ghetto, gendered division of housework, violence, sexual harassment, and so on, there continues to be a need for activism. I support this but not to the exclusion of other issues. Because I do not want to participate in the ranking of oppression I reject the label “feminist�. By concentrating on practice rather than theory, the experiences and needs of real people: their “flesh, blood, violence, sexuality, [and] anger� (Rich 155) will be central to the movement for equality.
Works Cited
Anderson, Lauren. “Why I’m a Feminist.� Canadian Woman Studies. No. 4/1, Vol. 20/21: 32-34.
“Feminism.� The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. 2000. Boston, MA: Houghton Mifflin Company. 21 September 2005 http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=feminism.
Rich, Adrienne. “Resisting Amnesia: History and Personal Life� Bread Blood and Poetry: Selected Prose, 1970-1985. New York: W. W. Norton, 1986: 136-155.
Sakshi
Jul 7th, 2006 at 1:14 am | #
Sudha – Thanks for citing the article. An excellant piece of words.
As I mentioned in my post too, definition of Feminism differs from women to women..it depends on how comfortable you are under your own skin and much more.
Nilu
Jul 7th, 2006 at 2:53 am | #
Just curious, did not Patrix say something about good English and the like?
sudha
Jul 7th, 2006 at 3:06 am | #
nilu: how much more adorable do you think you can get
?
Women
Jul 7th, 2006 at 3:07 am | #
Wow…Nilu raising a question over good english…a man who only knows how to puke on his own blog and other’s blog. Its completely ironic.
@Sakshi – Way to go girl!
thelearner
Jul 7th, 2006 at 5:25 am | #
“I would like to use this opportunity to once and for all clear my stance on ‘Feminist’ and the reasons why I chose to be one.”
Was the objective of the post to write about feminism itself or to write about why Sakshi Juneja is a feminist?
“Just as all five fingers are not the same…”
Everything before that line tells us what Sakshi Juneja did, felt, why, and how she wrote the post. It did not tell us anything of substance about Feminism itself.
The remaining half did talk about Feminism, but still failed to add any new insight, except for this:
“A good humanist is also a good feminist. The two terms can be interchangeable to a great degree.”
And just then it ended with lyrics from a Natasha Bedingfield song. (!!?)
By comparison, Sudha’s comment (though not her own) was more informative.
This is not flame. Since you’re guest writing for another (popular) blog, you should have tried harder.
Sakshi
Jul 7th, 2006 at 5:43 am | #
Dear Learner – Before I begin to write over what you have commented here, I would like to you read this.
“DesiPundit will feature two articles on the DP blog (top-right corner of the homepage) by notable desi bloggers who will write on their experiences in the desi blogosphere.” – Link
Hopefully this answers your query and putforths the whole purpose behind the write-up.
Agree Sudha’s comment was informative but I was asked to relate my views on feminsim with my blogging experience…and not preach/teach/ or re-pharse other feminists views.
Well if you don’t agree with my thoughts or my post on the whole…can’t say much about that since we all have a right of expression.
Thanks for the feedback…anyways.
thelearner
Jul 7th, 2006 at 5:55 am | #
Ah.. that covers it. Thank you.
Arthur Quiller-Couch
Jul 7th, 2006 at 9:13 am | #
Could you please say all that again in simple English?
Some of us men don’t spell too good…
Nikita
Jul 7th, 2006 at 10:07 am | #
mann I don’t understand why some people are getting confused by this post. It is so easy to understand that Sakshi is merely putting her experience and what she regards feminism to be thats it. Not to lecture us all what bloody feminism is and how we should go about it solving it blah blah blah!!! Plus it’s nice to read something that is written from the blogger’s perspective than copy and paste some article on the topic like sudha has. i could have just googled it. Also, some people have staated this blog post as being a comical post. I really don’t see the funny side of it. Don’t get me wrong I am far from serious in life but, i really don’t get the funny side!!!
Mann you all need to read the article carefully so as to avoid misinterpreting it
here is something that is actually funny:
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A Mega-sore-arse
vikram
Jul 8th, 2006 at 4:25 am | #
“Sakshi’s post is simple and thats its plus point. Don’t know why some people feel so threatened by the concept of feminism?”
Good on you Sakshi ! And the morons who try to get you down…can rot in hell.
Egalitarian
Jul 8th, 2006 at 4:51 am | #
Twelve-Step Feminist Cure
Sakshi
Jul 8th, 2006 at 1:20 pm | #
Twelve Step Feminist Cure….
Yup excatly what I was looking for. A fun read all the way.
Just one thing though….so much dependence on God, aint that good. I am sure he/she has loads on others duties to take care off…plus they have a life too. How can we be so selfish?
And what about Atheist Feminists?
ps..even Tom Cruise Was – Right! is bloody good work.